Khan ka emotional atyachaar.....

Shahrukh Khan had to go through the hell when he was detained at San Francisco airport while his fans patiently waited outside for hours. He did not like it - we did not like it too. We forgot about it and he made a movie out of it....

Don't get me wrong. If an artist does not express himself, he is not doing his duty. My only submission is that that duty needs to be discharged in a responsible manner - in a manner where you do not cross the line between the art and outburst.

May I say the following?

SHAHRUKH KHAN: Sir you deserve the capital letters as you have single handedly shoulderedthe responsibility of carrying the entire film. Sir, the only reason people do not get up and break this arduous journey of 180 minutes is because of your phenomenal acting once again.

Shibani Bhatija: Ms. Bhatija, In our school there was an exercise called precis writing. I remember it, my daughter is practicing it. YOU NEED TO LEARN IT! and a small but important question - Where is the script?

Karan Johar: Sir, You are a great friend of Shahrukh's. We respect and admire that but we also would have admired if you would have respected our time and emotional quotient.

Kajol: Darling, you can have a life beyond Shahrukh. You have been an equal partner with Karan and Shahrukh but please be selective when they approach you.

Audience: Karan has used the same sentimental tricks. Do not succumb to his emotional atyachaar once again.

PLEASE GO TO A GOOD THEATRE WHERE THEY SERVE GOOD FOOD. YOU WILL NEED A LOT OF IT. ALSO CARRY WATER AS YOU ARE LIKELY TO BE DEHYDRATED AS YOU CRY.

***

Up in the air is up there!!!

Director Jason Reitman has already showed promise in Juno (2007) and now he strikes back with the most apt theme of the year movie - " Up in the air".

As the credits rolled by I struggled to put a genre to the movie - that's where the movie scored.

Jason has picked up 6-7 days in life of Mr. Ryan Bingham (George Clooney - brilliant acting) who works in this "niche" consulting farm that doles out both - motivational training as well as retrenchment solutions to corporate America. As you follow Ryan through his grueling travel schedule, he strikes you as a cold blooded arsehole who is willing to make a career out of firing people (just like some of my former bosses....) and earn miles with his airlines in the bargain!!

Ryan's life takes a turn as a new smarty pants (played very well by Anna Kendrick - again a brilliant actress) in his office sets up a new way of firing people - over the video conference! Ryan makes an unsuccessful but a valiant attempt to show to his boss - with the smarty pants in his tow - that his job is irreplaceable. And one more thing, while all this is happening Ryan is chasing his love.....

While the story line is simple, it is the journey that is interesting. The journey where Ryan learns what happens after people get fired, how does it feel to CONNECT, how is it easy to be lonely and extremely difficult to belong....

You will enjoy....

• George Clooney, Vera Farmiga (Ryan's lady love) and Anna Kendrick in their memorable roles - Guys it does not matter who wins Oscar for best performance - whether any one wins it or not - it is that moment in life when all three of you can go home and enjoy a glass of whiskey knowing that you have done a phenomenal job...
• The dialogues - wit, humor, sarcasm and above all the reactions of people being fired - hats off once more to Jason Reitman and Sheldon Turner for a beautiful screenplay and dialogues.

PLEASE TAKE YOUR PARTNER WITH YOU AND WATCH THIS MOVIE IN A GOOD THEATRE WHERE PEOPLE VALUE MOVIE MORE THAN POP CORNS.

Last but not least, I want to show this movie to Subhash Ghai and Karan Johar. Guys you have made fabulous movies all your lives and I have saluted you many times but please go and see Up in the air and learn the art of concisely telling stories from this movie...

Bravo!!!!!

*****

Run from Rann....

Ram Gopal Varma - the relentless movie maker is here with Rann. As is much publicised and promised by the promos, Rann deals with the dilemma, drama and delusions of media industry. Here are a few points to ponder before you choose to indulge in Rann....

1. RGV is yet again successful in drawing up a huge canvas or a forum where the country's best artists can come and perform. The life size meaty roles that the actors usually care for have been allotted to Amitabh, Paresh, Riteish et al and they do not disappoint at all. The two surprises are Neetu Chandra and Sudeep...
2. The script stops far short of expectations. Rohit Banawlikar - do you have any thing new to say? In your story, your claim of media sensationalizing every story and the magnetization of ethics is a story that my daughter can tell me. Very weak script indeed...This yet again proves the point that the audience world around resonate - the script is the soul of the film. If you do not have anything interesting to say there won't be too many listeners - especially the ones you expect to pay and listen!!
3. Point 3 is therefore a corollary to point 2. A WORD TO THE WISE.... Actors have to read and verify the strength of the script before accepting the movie coz the acting will be forgotten alongwith the movie and far worse is that not too many people will see the movie....
4. Music and lyrics are razz matazz and have nothing to add to the feel and tone of the movie. some times silence is golden.......
5. Ramu - please listen to me. Audience are not as patient as you think they are...they were mighty impressed with Rangeela, Satya and Company but Aag, Rann, Darna Zaroori hai, agyaat....Before the audience gets confused which films to associate you with let us go back to olden golden days.....

Meanwhile Friends, run from RANN.....

Infrastructure around nothingness....

WHAT IS NOTHINGNESS? Nothingness is one's feeling immediately after one has lost a job. Suddenly the job stress is gone. You feel that some one has opened your skull and taken away a rock. What is left is the feeling of nothingness!!! This feeling is quite akin to the one when you hear your boss blabbering away to glory on some inconsequential topic and your mind wanders off to the land of nothing...

Anyways, the question is what does one do when one gets NOTHINGNESS. India has been a land of karmayogis and therefore Indians do not relate well to any one out of job or sitting at home doing nothing. Your neighbors think you are good for nothing, your parents think you have done something awful at your work place and your maid keeps wondering when will you free up TV so that she can get back to her saas bahu bickering stuff.......

I think in a country where losing a job is going to be a regular occurrence, we need a lot of infrastructure surrounding nothingness....Here are a few ideas....

• JOBASHRAM: A lot of companies today "indulge" in community services. They set aside a sum of money every year towards community services. Actually, many of these organizations are leaders in creating joblessness. My suggestion is to use their community service program to clean the community mess that they themselves have created. The monies set aside for community services can be used to open JOBASHRAMS. All "sackers" (decision makers who fire people either out of a whim or due to some pathological reasons) should also be asked to contribute 5 days of their salary every month for JOBASHRAMS. The monies so collected can be used to fund JOBASHRAMS - a place where people with nothingness can hang out, network, share their experiences, bitch about their bosses and make friends. This way the maids too will get more TV time.
• AA GROUP: Anti-sacking Anonymous group - AA group is behavior correction facility for habitual sackers. AA group would be made of people from both sides - the "sackers" and the "sacked ones". Each sacker would be compulsorily asked to meet each and every individual that he has sacked once a week. Every week the people with nothingness will describe in detail what they are going through to their respective sackers. NO EARPLUGS ALLOWED! All sackers who have sacked 5 people or more should compulsorily attend AA at least once a week. Again the funding required for the group should come from the sackers 5 days salary in a month.
• PS 3 / X-BOX / NINTENDO / PC GAMES: We would request another 5 days of sackers pay to create a venture capital fund that will provide seed funding to gaming companies. The funding would be made available to promote and create anti-boss, anti-sackers games that provide much needed stress relief to all the existing sufferers - either with jobs or the "sacked ones" The one with jobs may have to pay a bit to enjoy these games. The sackers can keep scores and reward high scorers from their provident funds.

As is usually the case with everything in India, it will take eons before this very basic infrastructure is in place. But my sincere urge to all fellow sufferers is to rise and make a small beginning somewhere so that both you and I can enjoy NOTHINGNESS!!!

Jaihind!